How Men & Women Decide

Women are feelers, men are thinkers.

Women make decisions based on feelings, emotions, and their intuition. Men make decisions based on logic. This doesn’t mean women don’t think logically, or men don’t have a heart. Both do, they simply don’t rely on them quite like the other. It’s incredibly important to have this understanding about the opposite sex when you’re trying to come to a mutual agreement (on anything), end a fight, argue less, and love each other more.

Here’s a recent (and somewhat entertaining) example:

Jairek and I went surfing last weekend and both decided I should get a rash guard to protect my tummy, chest and arms from getting roughed up on the board. I jumped, squealed and laughed hysterically at a tank top style rash guard (seen below) which I immediately knew I had to buy, REGARDLESS of how effective it was at protecting my chest and arms, simply because it made me feel AWESOME! (emotion)

On the flipside, Jairek, though more entertained by my reaction and less by the tank itself, wondered why on Earth would I get one that hardly covered me to avoid a rash from the board, which was the reason we were buying one in the first place…(logic) Needless to say, he we were both stumped by the other’s reasoning, and nearly bought both. Regardless, we had an amazing time!

When you can let go of what you think is right or wrong, and try to understand the other person’s reasoning, it makes for a far more happier times as you’ll each feel more love and respected.

Next time you don’t agree with your girlfriend, boyfriend, husband or wife (or whatever title you call your boo) remember men and women prioritize logic and emotion differently. It’s not by choice in fact, it’s literally our brains. Men’s brains, physically, have a different layout which is far more task and mission focused. Women’s brains, more interconnected, allow them to consider more than the mission or task at hand. (See more on this research here) This means a man’s logic, or formula, for the way something should be is processed regardless of their emotion. Whereas women’s emotion is a feeling, or intuition, overrides logic because her brain takes more into account in processing information.

One way to argue less, and love more, in your relationship is to first understand our brains are literally wired differently. And unless you’re a brain surgeon, it’s highly unlikely you’re ever going to be able to change it. More importantly, take a step back and look at it from the opposite filter or point of view. Is she simply feeling this way, regardless of logic? If so, try to understand her feelings first before thinking you’ll be able to change her mind with your logic. Is he being completely logical, without any care for feelings? If so, remove your feelings and communicate your view points using only logic, if you want him to understand.

Often times men will put emotions in the backseat, much like women will throw logic out the window. The more you understand how completely different men and women, the better you’ll understand how to communicate… and love one another to the moon and back!

Next up, I’m going to share why women bring things up from the past… stay tuned!

Amanda