Where do I find LOVE?
This question has so many answers it is almost comical… Here are my top 10 favorites:
1. Love comes from with-in. You must first discover it with-in yourself before you can experience it with another.
2. The grocery store is the perfect place to find your true love
3. Partaking in activities that you LOVE will bring you in proximity with your potential true love (hoping they have similar values and interests is key)
4. Stop worrying about it… just live life full out, do what you LOVE and when you least expect it he or she will enter into your world!
5. Online dating sites (ex: Match.com, PleantyofFish.com…etc.)
6. Professional Matchmaking companies (
7. At your place of worship (ex: Church, Synagogue, Mass…etc.)
8. Friends/Family/Colleagues setting you up on a blind date (good luck!)
9. At the office (this could be dangerous, but more likely than other options mentioned so far)
10. In a physical activity (ex: The gym, running clubs, sports leagues…etc.)
Here is what I find interesting about every single suggestion listed above along with all of the others that you may have heard about (PS: If you have a suggestion that was not listed above please feel free to add your comment below and add in your suggestion of “where to find love”) is that some of them actually align with the actual data collected from studies over the years… while other suggestions sound like a great idea… but do not have a ton of data to back it up (as of now). So here is a list of the studies and data around “What causes someone to get into a relationship with another person”…
#1 – Proximity – a study conducted by Festinger, Schachter, and Black (1950) shows that people living closer in proximity where more likely to become friends and start a “relationship” that those living further away from one another.
#2 – Similarity – the old sayings … “Birds of a feather (thats right) flock together”. A study by Newcomb (1961) shows that people of similar demographics, attitudes and values are more likely to become friends which would lead to be more likely to eventually starting a relationship together.
#3 – Interpersonal (Communication) style
#4 – Interests and Experiences
#5 – Reciprocal Liking – People many times have a HUGE fear of being rejected. So if someone shows that they are favorable of you, it may lead you to start finding aspects of them that you like.
#6 – Physical Attractiveness – What Is “Attractive” in men and women
#7 – The Power of Familiarity – The more familiar you are with a person the more likely you are to show them the “real you” which many times is the most attractive version of you.
Here is a link to read the findings of the study
So… The best way to find love is to #1 discover and define “What is love” to you personally (might want to visit our page on “what is love” for our insights and suggestions).
Once you have defined What love is to you… next would be to then locate places which people of that nature, attitude, values…etc. would be in life and begin to spend consistent time in those places. (example: if love to you is someone that would spend countless hours viewing art, or jamming out to your favorite types of music, playing a sport, working out, or reading book after book then you’d want to spend time consistently in the places that someone doing those activities would be)
Now that you are in proximity with people who share similar values/interests keep your eyes open for that one that sparks your interest! From that point you will need to learn to be the true authentic you (see “Finding The Authentic You” blog post).